Changes in character. Is it possible to change your character, and how? What is character
In youth, people do not often think about how to change their character. As a rule, this thought comes with growing up and the desire to fully communicate with others. A person realizes that everyone around is not obliged to love him if he does not love himself, constantly whines and complains about life, is angry or lazy.
The moment you realize that your character is the cause of difficult relationships in the family or at work, you need to urgently take action to correct the situation.
First step: positive thinking
Basically, bad character bad habit, but getting rid of it is more difficult than, for example, quitting smoking. If you can control yourself and not buy a pack of cigarettes, then there will be nothing to smoke, but unnecessary thoughts are harder to throw out of your head.
Remember, your character is your idea of life. What you think about yourself will grow and develop within you. So always imagine what kind of person you want to become.
If you are used to constantly regretting something and talking about how unlucky you are in life, think about what you have. Every person has something to be grateful for: health, children, work, appearance. If you think that there is nothing, this is your chance to start everything from scratch. The first thing to do before changing character is to learn to think positively.
There is an interesting technique that can help you with this. Take a simple rubber band for money and put it on your hand. As soon as it gets into your head negative thought, immediately pull the elastic and “click” - remember that everything is fine, but it will be even better. The habit of controlling your thoughts and not letting yourself slide into a swamp of envy, resentment, scandals will make you an optimist, and happiness without optimism is impossible. In its turn, happy man confident in himself, he rejoices for himself and for others, gives a good mood to others.
Step two: love yourself
The second, without which it will not be possible to change your character, is self-love. Every morning, waking up and stretching sweetly, go to the mirror, smile and say: “I love you.” Repeat to yourself as often as possible that every minute you become better, kinder, more self-confident.
Such auto-training will set the right mood for the whole day, and having received the right setting, you will follow it automatically.
Not loving yourself because you don't like your character is pointless. Until you accept yourself as you are, you will be filled with negativity towards yourself, and this only destroys. You, on the contrary, need to learn how to create - to create a new person who will correspond to your ideas.
Step Three: Behavior Analysis
Character - a set of habits to respond in any way to emerging situations. Given that life consists of repetitive moments, learn to analyze your behavior. It's a good idea to start keeping a diary. Describe what happened to you during the day, how you behaved and how you should have acted.
For example, you want to become more confident in yourself, and today your boss suggested filling out a vacation schedule. Of course, you modestly kept silent, although you dreamed of going on vacation in August. Describe the current situation and the reasons for your timidity, make up an exemplary dialogue with your boss that could take place. The next day, with this conversation plan, go ahead and boldly explain to your superiors that August is perfect for your vacation. A few of these situations, and soon you will be able to fend for yourself.
Before you change your character, think about whether you really need it. If you do not feel discomfort in communicating with other people and live in harmony with yourself, you may not need change. You should not be guided by the opinion of one person who does not like something about you.
Regardless of which character trait you decide to fight, you will need to follow a simple plan. First, determine what exactly is behind this problem, what caused it, and what you want to replace it with. For example, if you want to stop getting angry over something stupid, start smiling. Studies have shown that a habit is formed within 30 days. This means that if you control your emotions for a month, then after this time the changes will be obvious. If the list of what you want to change is quite extensive, highlight the main points (1-2) that you will work on first.
Thinking about how you can change your character, you should understand that reflections alone are not enough, serious work on yourself will be required. When a person is not satisfied with his body, he goes on a diet and goes to the gym. Action is always needed to get results. Therefore, having made a decision to change, act, because the quality of your life depends on it.
Anna, Taganrog
Psychologist's comment:
Character is a set of stable mental properties and habitual standard ways of behavior. Very often, character is described through a set of "character traits". Is it possible to change character at all? The answer is yes, although it is not an easy task. Character is a secondary education, depends on personal development. A personality can, in its development, overcome those features that are unacceptable for it, for example, as the author of the article writes, when "character is the cause of difficult relationships in the family or at work." Pay attention to the fact that there is a difference between personality, what a person lives for (what is important to him, what is indifferent to him) and character, which determines how exactly the process of interaction with the world is implemented. There is even an expression: Good man with a bad temper."
Why does a person need character? It is necessary to preserve the personality itself and those motives that drive a person, i.e. it has a protective function. In order to systematize and simplify life in society, a person accumulates a set of habits - stereotypical ways of behavior (in order not to constantly encounter a situation of uncertainty and not to solve constant intrapersonal problems in everyday life).
Remember the beginning of the well-known proverb: "If you sow an act, you will reap a habit ...". Character begins with an act in an uncertain situation. “Essentially, a bad character is like a bad habit,” in principle, this is true. But we must remember that the character begins to build from childhood around the innate properties of a person: the type of nervous system, temperament.
The author of the article points out that the desire to change the character comes, as a rule, in adulthood with the emergence of problems in communication, when “a person realizes that everyone around is not obliged to love him if he does not love himself, constantly whines and complains about life, gets angry or lazy." The main reason why a person wants to change is to receive love, respect, recognition from other people. What lies even deeper? It can be difficult to get to the bottom of this on your own. Perhaps it is a fear of being alone or an emotional dependence on another person who wants you to change. Here there is a danger of changing oneself to please others, of ignoring one's own needs, interests, even fears, i.e. Actually, don't love yourself.
Even if you, having independently analyzed the causes and consequences of your behavior, got to the bottom of the truth, it can be difficult to implement changes in your life. The psychologist will spot the pitfalls, create a favorable environment for you to try out new ways of behaving, gaining new experiences in a safe but meaningful environment.
What problems can a person who decides to change his character on his own face? On his way, he is likely to face relapses, a return to the old, with a sense of guilt about this, and as a result, a decrease in mood and motivation for change, he may experience intrapersonal conflicts, a “rebellion” against the demanding “inner parent” and he will also find that self-hypnosis works for a limited time. And another important point - there will be other unexpected changes that will take your attention and time (changing an element of the system, we affect the entire system as a whole). Remember that you need to give yourself time so that the changes have time to integrate into life.
Now let's look at a few individual features that the author proposes to work on. If a person is “angry”, then it is possible that this is a signal that the situation does not suit him (he wants changes and even has energy for this), perhaps he is pulling an unbearable load, overstraining, or those around him do not hear him.
It is also necessary to understand what it means when a person is “lazy” in each specific case and the reasons for laziness. It can be both chronic fatigue and burnout syndrome. Laziness can be the cause of intrapersonal conflict, when, for example, there are arguments for doing something, but there are arguments against resistance. Maybe an inner sense of the senselessness of any action and at the same time hope for a miracle.
It may turn out that a person has a weak type of nervous system, he needs more rest (others see him as a lazy person), and this is an innate feature. It is necessary to take into account your own characteristics in the formation of your individual style (then you can compensate for the innate qualities of the nervous system, such as fatigue, excitability, etc.). And here there are already other tasks - to accept yourself, adapt and explain to others that everything is fine with you - you are just like that by nature. Try to declare love to yourself! Here a string of new problems and situations may arise when others do not allow you to be the way you are. A person learns his character, as well as his changes, through other people. In terms of "serious work on oneself" one can fully agree with the author. And sometimes it may turn out that a person wants to change the environment, and not change his character.
The author of the article identifies a sequence of three steps for character change - positive thinking, self-love and behavior analysis. By themselves, positive thinking and self-love, the achievement of these states is already a goal and a great value. Here we can already talk about a change in character. “Your character is your idea of life. What you think about yourself will grow and develop in you.” I would say the first step is raising awareness. It is necessary to change the character from a change in attitude to the world, to oneself (I agree with the author), if this takes root, then we can assume that the character has changed.
We can agree with the phrase that "a happy person is confident in himself, he rejoices for himself and for others, gives a good mood to others." And a happy person knows his own characteristics, strengths and weaknesses, accepts himself. Here and self-sufficiency and completeness. Other people have a great sense of our mood, what can be expected from you, and try to be closer.
In conclusion, I would like to add that a person grows, changes - this is normal and natural. You can change spontaneously under the influence of the environment (opinions of other people, society, circumstances), or you can cultivate what you think is important to develop or keep in yourself. Train your skill like a muscle! Therefore, it is important to discuss with other people and experiment. The most effective way to do this is with a professional psychologist.
Psychologist-consultant Natalia Sushinina
Before developing ingenious strategies, reading psychoanalysis manuals, find out for yourself what exactly is wrong with you, what flaws lurk in your character.
To do this, conduct a kind of survey of your friends, relatives and friends on the negative features of your willful disposition and unbridled temperament. Try to find out from them what annoys others about you, whether you have, in their opinion, strengths and weaknesses. Perhaps what you consider the norm of behavior, for most of the people around you, seems like blatant arrogance or immorality. These habits need to be broken immediately.
When the right material has been collected, fix everything that happened on paper. Do not try to hide, downplay or conceal something, try to look at yourself objectively, through other people's eyes, as if from the outside. This will be the first step towards further transformation.
Seek advice from a qualified professional. To understand what type and type of character you have, have several conversations with a psychologist who can get to the bottom of your problem and suggest ways to solve it.
Motivation is the key to change
Think about what advantages the new “I” will bring to you, because character change is a very difficult and long path that only a person with developed willpower can overcome. Decide for yourself how much you need such metamorphoses, whether the game is worth the candle.
Sometimes a person blames character for his problems, but this is not always the right approach. Sometimes the cause of failures are the complexes imposed modern society or acquired in early childhood.
Motivation plays an important role in the process of character breaking. If the changed nature helps you find a more prestigious job, become more successful, establish relationships with family and friends, then the process of transformation will take place faster - you will have a good incentive.
The next step is visualization
Constantly keep in mind and mentally reproduce new features of the future character. Without this procedure, you will slide back to where you started. If you do not know what exactly you want, if there is no clearly defined one that you need to strive for, then it is impossible to achieve anything. It is necessary to unequivocally present the model that should become a reality.
Say no to copying and imitation!
Most people want to change their character only in order to adapt to someone, whether it be a boss, parents or a significant other, somehow please them, but at the same time they do not think about themselves.
If your colleague is more successful, this does not mean that you need to adopt the manner of his behavior, gestures, some chips in communication. Each person is unique in their own way. Everyone has a talent that needs to be discovered in the right place at the right time.
In trying to improve your character, be careful not to acquire new, hitherto unknown to you, bad habits.
Improve yourself, and do not copy someone else's character. Develop spiritually: read books, be kinder, think about others, and not just about yourself.
If you are asking this question, then most likely you have difficulties in communicating with other people, you are unable to build relationships, people do not pay attention to you, or they make claims about your difficult character. In short, you cannot get along with other people because some of your character traits prevent you from doing so. Of course, there are other reasons why you want to change your character. Maybe you want to be like another person because he or she likes someone who likes you. There are many reasons, and in this article we will answer the question: "How to change your character?".
To begin with, it would be nice to answer the questions of what character is, what character is made of, and how it is formed. Generally from the Greek word "character" translates as "imprint". From here everything becomes clear. The character of a person is very closely related to the type of temperament, since it is from him that specific reactions to any events occur. It is impossible to change, but with the help you can reduce, or even completely eliminate negative traits. Some character traits are innate, and they are inherited. But innate character traits have a small share. Most character traits are formed under the influence of life experience, upbringing and environment or environment.
Agree, if you were born in another country or in another family, your character would be completely different. So remember, 95% of character traits are formed under the influence of the external environment. The remaining remaining percentages depend on genetics and temperament type.
As you have noticed by yourself, a person's character changes throughout life. These changes occur unconsciously, as if the program worked in right time. After all, in childhood you had some values and hobbies, in adulthood they were completely different, in old age they were also different. But the foundation of character is laid in childhood, and by the age of 4-5, we can safely say that the child already has his own character.
Then there are major changes in school years. In adulthood, changes in character will occur due to any events, under the influence of other people and age-related changes. By the age of 50, a person stops living in the future, stops making plans, and already begins to think about the past. After the age of 60, a person switches to new stage life, when the past and the present become significant. There is calmness and calmness.
Every person has certain character traits. As you know, there are no absolutely identical people, even among twins (by the way, I just have a twin brother), which at first glance seem to be exactly the same. It is very good that all personalities are unique, otherwise it would be boring to live among the same people. If we talk about character traits, then according to the Teplov system, they are divided into four groups.
The first group includes common features character, which are the psychological basis for a person. This is sincerity, courage, activity, diligence and so on. There are also their opposites: insincerity, pessimism, cowardice, passivity.
The second group includes those character traits that express the attitude of the individual towards other people. Just this group is strongly associated with the type of temperament. This is either isolation, kindness or malevolence, indifference or attentiveness, love or contempt, and so on.
The third group of character traits includes those traits in which a person's attitude towards himself is expressed. This category includes such character traits as pride, vanity, megalomania, self-esteem, selfishness,.
The fourth group reflects the attitude of the individual to work. Laziness or diligence, and overcoming difficulties, or their fear, initiative and activity, or lack of initiative and passivity.
How to change your character?
It's time to talk about how to change your character. Some character traits are easy to change if they are not opposite. But if you want to change such a character trait as irascibility to calmness, long and hard work will be required here. Some character traits cannot be changed due to temperament. I have already spoken about this above. Also, after thirty years, it is also very difficult to change anything in yourself, but nothing is impossible. In fact, a person can always change in himself what he does not like.
And before you start to change something in yourself, you first need to determine what exactly you want to change, what character traits.
So take a piece of paper and write down the character traits that you would like to eliminate. Below each trait, write how and when that trait manifests itself. So it will be easier for you to control yourself and avoid wrong actions and reactions. Also remember to be aware. This is a very important point, because you know that most reactions and actions occur unconsciously. Therefore, the first month will be very difficult for you.
The second way that will make it easier for you to change your character is if you replace your negative trait with a positive one. In this case, you will focus not on preventing such and such a reaction or action, but on behaving differently.
For example, if you want to eliminate such a character trait as intemperance, then you will get rid of it much easier if you cultivate in yourself such a character trait as patience. If you try to get rid of isolation, then you will not be able to do this if you do not begin to cultivate in yourself such a character trait as sociability. You can't get rid of cowardice if you don't. This technique is called "substitution". You are not getting rid of, but you are replacing a character trait.
Once you have decided on the traits you want to get rid of and replace with, you should visualize yourself with these character traits. In fact, it works very powerfully. When you imagine your behavior many times in specific situations, it really starts to show up in the way you imagined it. I have seen this a million times in my experience. Visualization helps a lot to change your character. The main thing here is regularity, as well as awareness of your reactions and actions.
After a month of control over your new habits and actions, your new character traits will appear automatically. You will no longer need to control them, everything will happen on autopilot. And it's all thanks to NLP. That is, a new neural network is formed in your brain, which is responsible for this or that habit. The most difficult is the beginning, and very difficult.
I also want to warn you not to try to completely remake yourself. I understand that something in yourself does not suit you, but it is unlikely that you will be able to change yourself completely by 180 degrees, and this is not necessary. Some character traits are better to accept, because they can be yours. strong point. yourself the way you really are.
character of a person, character traits, how to change your character
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How to change the character - Do not be "harmful"!
What is a character?
- What is character?
Is it possible to change your temperament and how?
- Three steps to character change
- Instructions for changing your nature
- Conclusion
Xapactep - this is a combination of stable mental properties and habitual standard behaviors. Very often, the character is described through the totality of "features of the character." Is it possible to change character at all? The answer is yes, although this is not an easy task. Character is a secondary education, depends on personal development.
A person can, in his development, overcome those traits that are unacceptable for him, for example, as the author of the article writes, when “character is the cause of difficult relationships in the family or at home.” Pay attention to the fact that there is a difference between personality, what a person lives for (what is important to him, what is indifferent) and the character that determines how exactly the process of interaction is realized.
Is it possible to change your temperament and how?
The character of a person is, first of all, his habits, it is his typical way of thinking, behaving and responding. Character is not given to a person along with genes in a ready-made form from birth: it also depends on upbringing, environment, education and many other factors.
The character changes naturally in a person, himself, throughout life, primarily depending on age. Childish immediacy of reaction is replaced by youthful impulsiveness, which after a dozen or two years calms down in adult prudence. Also, temperament tends to become less positive with age...and downright negative with age (see the Emotional Tone Scale).
In addition, the character of a person changes depending on the situation in which the person is. The most melancholic, at the sight of an approaching tsunami wave, will rush from it with the cheerfulness of a choleric. At work, a person can have one character - for example, energetic and collected. At home, the same person's character can become different, composure can change to absent-mindedness, energy to laziness. In the most cheerful person, if something hurts, the character, as a rule, becomes somehow lethargic and sad.
Character It's a set of habits, and habits can be changed. If you set yourself such a task and start training calm reactions, you can do it.
The ability to permanently and significantly change your character depends on several points. It depends on age: the younger the person, the less hardened patterns there are usually and the easier it is to change one's character. It also depends on individual, congenital characteristics. There are people who are innately capable of easily changing themselves and their character, and there are people who are innately fixed with a little changeable character.
We are all different. There is big number people who do not change their character simply because they are convinced: “Character cannot be changed!” And most importantly, what determines the variability of our character is the ability to change ourselves. Those who know how to change themselves change themselves more easily and more often.
Character, like habitual behavior, can be changed. How? Copying other people's behavior is the simplest and most natural way. From childhood, we learn by copying and imitating - we learn to walk, talk, react. It is complicated by the fact that exactly the person whom you want to copy should be nearby - and this is far from always the case. And if this happened and there is such a wonderful person next to you, take the opportunity!
You can start by copying other people's walks: the fact is that walk and character are connected. By walking, it is easy to tell about many features of a person, on the other hand, by changing your walk, you can (and should) gradually change (improve) your character.
If next to you it is difficult to find a person whose character traits you would like to copy, look for the necessary types in books, films, and finally come up with. Imagine and ask yourself more often, how should the ideal person for you behave in this situation? What will he say? What will he feel?
Again: character is a collection of habits, so your task is to acquire new, good habits in place of old ones. And in general - study the topic "How to work on yourself." You will succeed!
Three steps to character change
First step: positive thinking.
In fact, a bad character is like a bad habit, only getting rid of it is more difficult than, for example, quitting smoking. If you can keep yourself in your hands and not buy a pack of cigarettes, then there will be nothing to smoke, but it is more difficult to throw out unnecessary thoughts from your head. Remember, your character is your idea of life. What you think of yourself will grow and develop in you. Therefore, always imagine what kind of person you want to become.
The first thing you need to do before you change your character is to learn to think positively. There is an interesting technique that can help you with this. Take a simple rubber band for money and put it on your hand. As soon as a negative thought enters your head, immediately pull the rubber band and “click” - you remember that everything is fine, and it will be even better. The habit of controlling your thoughts and not letting yourself slide into a swamp of envy, resentment, scandals will make you an optimist, and happiness without optimism is impossible.
Second step: love for yourself.
Secondly, without which it will not be possible to change your character - love for yourself. Every morning, waking up and stretching sweetly, go to the mirror, smile and say: “I love you.” Repeat to yourself as often as possible that every minute you become better, kinder, more confident in yourself. Such auto-training will set the right mood for the whole day, and having received the correct setting, you will follow it automatically.
Not loving yourself because you don't like your character is pointless. Until you accept yourself as you are, you will be filled with negativity towards yourself, and this will only destroy. You, on the contrary, need to learn how to create - to create a new person who will correspond to your ideas.
Step three: behavior analysis.
Character - a set of habits to react in some way to emerging situations. Considering that life consists of repeating moments, learn to analyze your behavior.
A great idea would be to start keeping a diary. Describe what happened to you during the day, how you behaved and how you should have acted.
If you do not experience discomfort in communicating with other people and live in harmony with yourself, perhaps there is nothing for you to change. You should not be guided by the opinion of one person who does not like something in you.
No matter what trait you choose to fight, you will need to follow a simple plan. First, determine what exactly is behind this problem, what caused it, and what you want to replace it with.
Research has shown that a habit develops within 30 days. This means that if you control your emotions for a month, then after this time the changes will be obvious. If the list of what you want to change is quite extensive, highlight the main points (1-2) that you will work on first.
Instructions for changing your nature
Rule 1 Find a role model.
If you can’t control yourself on your own, choose an idol or role model for yourself.
In moments when you want to get angry or start a scandal, stop and think about how an idol would act in your place.
Rule 2 To change character, you need to want it.
This rule is the most important basis for changing character.
If your environment does not like your character, but it completely suits you, then it is better to change the environment, and not yourself. Because unless you want to change, you can't do anything.
Rule 3 Take a systematic approach.
Starting to change the character - develop a system.
To begin with, write down on paper all your character traits that it would not hurt to correct. After that, next to each trait, write the reasons why you want to change it. Seeing the big picture will make it easier for you to change and control yourself later on.
Remember, in changing character, you first need to develop a habit. And this is the most difficult. After all, if you are used to yelling at every trifle, it will be extremely difficult to restrain yourself at first. However, having overcome the initial barrier, it will be easier to change character further.
Rule 4 To change your character - start to control yourself.
Deciding to change character, start to control yourself and your emotions. For example, if your negative trait is short temper, then there is only one way to deal with it. The next time you want to flare up or start screaming, pause, close your eyes and slowly count to 10. I'm sure that after that, 90% of the time you won't feel like screaming.
Rule 5. Find a kindred spirit.
In this case, you have to find the same quarrelsome and angry person as you. Perhaps you will quickly find a common language with him. But besides this, you will quickly realize how not to act and begin to subconsciously change your character.
Rule 6 Do a good deed.
And it will not matter at all what kind of good deed you have done. The very act of kindness is important. Good deeds make us better, develop in us responsiveness and compassion.
To get started, you can:
1) help grandma cross the road,
2) pick up a homeless kitten,
3) help the needy with money.
Conclusion
I bet a lot of people are dissatisfied with their character. I have no doubt that this also applies to you, since you are reading this article. However, only a few are ready to act to change it.
Our character is constantly changing under the influence of current circumstances. We just don't always notice it. But some of his features remain unchanged since childhood. They are the ones we most often dislike. And that's what we want to change. It can be shyness, intemperance, outbursts of unreasonable anger and much more.
It is almost impossible to change immediately. But, if you constantly monitor yourself, albeit not immediately, but your character may change. The main rule is to want to change for yourself, not for the sake of others. Until you yourself want to become a different person, you will not succeed. And to speed up the process, you must constantly keep before your eyes the image of who you want to become.
Good luck!
The material was prepared by Dilyara specifically for the site
Having lived to a certain age, people often begin to question the quality of the path traveled. Did they do the right thing at one time or another? What opportunities have been missed? Or maybe this path could be completely different, and bring much more results?
Such considerations may arise in different ages. Asking them both at 25 and at 30-40 years old, a person not only analyzes his past experience. He is trying to re-evaluate how he lives and the present. It often happens that the conclusions turn out to be very unsatisfactory, and a verdict is passed about the need for change. In this case, there can be only one answer: you need to urgently change your character. And the faster, the more time has already been spent on unnecessary doubts, mistakes, anxieties.
How can this be done by an adult, mature person? And in general, is it really possible to change yourself? Consider a few tips that will help you make adjustments to your character - and therefore change your destiny.
Visualize your ideal self
When we are not satisfied with our habits, then, first of all, this is expressed in a critical attitude towards ourselves. However, it is impossible to build something new only on the basis of criticism and self-criticism. A more positive approach is needed. In order to decide on the end point of your self-improvement journey, you need to saturate your mind with positive images. These images should reflect what you are striving for. There is a desire to become more self-confident, or, for example, more philanthropic - imagine yourself as such.
Feed your mind as much positive information as possible. Watch movies, read books whose main characters make you sympathetic. When working on yourself, try not to strain and not force yourself. Put aside all self-blame for a while. Relax and imagine what your dream life could be like. It will certainly become such in time, when the inner work will be carried out.
When perfect image already selected, it is necessary to take into account some important factors. Visualization will bring the greater effect, the more often it is used. It is also necessary to present an improved copy of yourself in as much detail as possible. Imagine in detail that you have already become the person you want to be.
hard work
Get ready for long and hard work, as changing the character for the better without effort is nothing more than a child's fantasy. Your behavioral traits, ideas about yourself and the world have been formed over many years - and maybe even decades. Therefore, be prepared for the fact that a long process of working on yourself can cause many difficulties, including resistance to it. Some of those who want to change their lives are too impatient. They also give up personal growth just because they didn’t see real results at some point.
Another obstacle is dishonesty, even in private. Sometimes people try to embellish themselves. Sometimes - on the contrary, to belittle. Regardless of these extremes, in order to move to a qualitatively different level of life, it is necessary to have a correct idea of both your current shortcomings and advantages. Sometimes you may need to work with a psychologist.
Start cultivating self love
To perform any work, strength is needed - including work on oneself. If you do not have that person who would constantly provide moral support, not skimping on inspiring words, then this recommendation is especially important for you. Self-love can be expressed in different ways - it is taking care of your body, playing sports, devoting time to a hobby. Without this quality, it is impossible to build full-fledged relationships with other people.
Work on building adequate self-esteem
On the one hand, in order to successfully change your character for the better, it is important to recognize and appreciate your positive qualities and talents. On the other hand, adequate self-esteem is based on one interesting statement. Be warned: it may seem unpleasant. This statement sounds like this: “I am neither better nor worse than others.” One who suffers from low self-esteem may not be aware of the effectiveness and healing nature of this truth.
After all, if there is a need for constant reinforcement that a person is good and deserves the best, most likely, there is a bias in his perception of the people around him. Very often, such a belief can take root due to improper upbringing, lack of attention in childhood. Then, having already matured, he can constantly seek approval from others. Or another option - such a person may subconsciously consider himself better. In the latter case, you need to instill a new belief in yourself. It should be repeated every day until it becomes self-evident.
Often, to work on yourself, it is recommended to use affirmations. The main difficulty in using them is that the subconscious part of the mind cannot always believe them. After all, if you constantly repeat that you are confident in yourself, but in fact you are not, your brain will certainly feel a catch. In this case, you can slightly adjust them. Instead of the phrase "I am confident in myself", you can repeat the modified version: "I am becoming more confident in myself."
Charity can be a great way to increase self-esteem. By doing good deeds (it is not necessary to advertise them), a person begins to feel better. The main plus is that this happens not without reason, which means that the subconscious has something to believe.
All these points are only the basis that can serve as further life changes. They say that a person's destiny is his character. Having managed to properly lay this foundation and overcome internal obstacles, one can really count on a change in fate.
